Share 4 Somethings in August
It's the last Saturday of the month and time for Share 4 Somethings with Jenn. This year we're sharing something we loved, something that sustained us, something we're carrying forward, and something we're making space for each month.
Something I loved: I had to drop a box fan off to Evan last Friday afternoon less than 24 hours after leaving him and he could not wait to tell me that he already had the names and numbers of 3 "new" people in his phone and had plans with some new friends that night. Seeing that beaming smile made me so happy (hearing he was already feeling sick did not...).
We took Alec and one of his roommates to lunch last Saturday and it was so fun listening to them trade stories and tease one another. Plus the food was delicious too.
Something that sustained me: Calls with my sister, support from family and friends, my husband's levelheadedness. One of my hiking friends met me for breakfast at Alec's work last Friday and treated to me my meal. I thought that was just so sweet. I've gotten a handful of cards from family and friends and those have been so sweet.
Something I'm carrying forward: Literally carry forward my "to do" list pertaining to my dad's estate but I'm pretty sure I'll be carrying this forward for at least a year as we slowly tick things off (I hope!). I met with a lawyer on Wednesday to get some detailed next steps/ direction ideas on where to go next.
Something I'm making space for: With all the back to school bags gone and Alec's plants and plant stands off at college with him we have all kinds of extra space now. I have, however, been going through and organizing the stuff they've left behind to make it easier on myself to clean their rooms. I will be making space in my closet this month to bring out some of my more fall-like clothes since it's getting a bit cooler (at times!). I dropped 2 huge boxes of books and puzzles off at our library for their annual sale. Basically I'm just making space but not really for anything more than my peace of mind.
How nice to be treated to breakfast! That is so thoughtful. I am glad you met with a lawyer and it will probably take about a year. My mom's wasn't as complicated but it took about a year and then we had to file last taxes for her personally and for her estate. We are still waiting on her personal tax refund. She passed away in January of 2025. Selling houses if you have to do that could take longer. We had a real estate agent that we trusted and who helped us greatly and an estate agent that sold off possessions and we had an accountant help us with taxes. We just had to delegate and have help from experts. If you ever want to talk about it, I'm here. It is hard emotionally, too. I had all the mail forwarded to me and I still get mail with my mom's name on it and some days I tear up. I took that on so my sister's wouldn't have that burden.
ReplyDeleteIt's not easy but it will get better.
The lawyer was pretty useless... we'll need to find one in Florida (which I did know going into the meeting). I have no idea if we'll be selling houses or anything or if he even files taxes anymore. We know NOTHING... and we have no way to get into any of the houses to look for anything nor the legal right since she's alive and owns them either outright or jointly. We have no clue where his mail is or what is happening with that... It's been a month and we are no closer to having anything whatsoever figured out.
DeleteThe food sounds delicious! And how sweet of your friend to treat you for breakfast. I love that when we need it, the people show up. I also love that you're keeping yourself busy at home and working on organizing and decluttering. I'm sure it's much needed after all the packing and going away stuff took over for a while!
ReplyDeleteThank you!
DeleteRight now our house feels full with all of Jack's things here. When he leaves, I'm planning a big clean out! I'm glad you are feeling cared for by friends and family as you move forward after losing your dad.
ReplyDeleteThanks! My brother took me out to breakfast yesterday.
DeleteYour dad's estate sounds super tricky to sort out- the issues sound complex and I'm not surprised that you struck out with one lawyer. Hopefully you'll find one with the knowledge or the ability to figure out exactly what needs to happen and when. How wonderful that Evan has made lots of new friends and has plans with them already. I hope he's feeling better.
ReplyDeleteAw, thank you. He sound like really enjoyed his fist week of college.
DeleteI hope you'll find a lawyer soon who will able to help you with the estate, it sounds really difficult.
ReplyDeleteI'm glad you also had such nice experiences, though, which will hopefully bring you some of the peace of mind you need.
Thank you!
DeleteWorking out all the paperwork from an estate is no joke- it can be overwhelming and time consuming. Hope you find a better lawyer. Glad all is working out at college for Evan..
ReplyDeleteAw, thanks!
DeleteI love how you’re balancing joy with responsibility -- celebrating Evan and Alec while also tackling estate matters step by step. Making space at home feels like such a peaceful reset.
ReplyDeleteThank you.
DeleteAww! It sounds like Evan is settling in well at college, how lovely he is making friends and great you could catch up with Alec and his friends.
ReplyDeleteThat is good you have a lot of support from family and friends. Sending love and hugs.
It does sound like he's really enjoying college.
DeleteSpace for your peace of mind sounds good to me.
ReplyDeleteThank you!
DeleteI'm sure your mind was eased a bit when Evan let you know he'd met some new people...what an adjustment for all.
ReplyDeleteYep, it was a huge relief to know he'd made some friends already.
DeletePeople and conversations can indeed be very helpful and help sustain you. I really like that one.
ReplyDeleteThanks!
DeleteWhen you're kids are happy, it's a huge relief! I'm so glad he's made friends already.
ReplyDeleteMe too! It has been a huge relief.
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