Not Just A Mom: How I Became A Mom

This month our Not Just a Mom group is looking to share stories about we became a mom--- this could be a birth story, an adoption story, a story about meeting your step-kids for the first time or a moment that just made you feel like a mom for the first time. 


Buckle up! I know this is going to be a long post. I kept a journal for all 3 of my boys about my pregnancy and thoughts/ feelings/ preparations during it and kept that going their first year of life so I have lots of details to share.  I'll add in plenty of cute baby photos though! 

Born 8 lbs 13.6 ounces

Obviously, in my case,  I became a mom when my oldest entered this world.  For as easy and breezy as my pregnancy with Ian was my labor and delivery was anything but.  

I was admitted into the hospital on a Thursday morning at 7:10 am for an induction.  But before they could even start Pitocin (for actual labor) they had to thin out my cervix.  They started the very long induction process by 8 am. By 12:30 there had been no progress but I was having regular and fairly close contractions which meant that they couldn't do much of anything but watch and wait. 

I did a lot of walking around all afternoon and by 5:30 there was still no change at all. They did insert a different drug into my cervix and finally by the middle of the night I had thinned out 1/2 way.  

Even in the hospital he was pretty wide awake-- and he never lost that full head of hair


6:30 am on Friday they finally started the Pitocin to bring on actual labor and it was pretty painful.  Within 2 hours I still had zero changes and spent yet another day waiting around.  I was having regular/ consistent contractions but by noon nothing had changed so they upped the meds again.  At 2:30 nothing had changed and the doctor still could not break my water so we began to discuss c-section options/procedure and alerted the hospital staff.  Going in I had wanted to avoid a c-section at all costs but by this time I was actually relieved to know that they would go in around dinnertime and end all this!

Around 3 or 4 one of the nurses came in and asked if I wanted to see an anesthesiologist since he was already in the ward and my doctor was also on her way to check on me. Between my doctor, myself, and the anesthesiologist it was decided I should get an epidural and try to get some sleep since they knew I hadn't really slept much in the past 36 hours. 

My mother in law came to peek in Saturday morning and was surprised that we had finally had him; but hadn't yet gotten around to calling anyone yet.  She had been out on an EMT call and stopped by.


Now in between all this 24+ hours we had had plenty of family members popping in throughout the course of our stay. My mother and husband's step mother worked at the hospital and my mother in law was an EMT so they often popped in on breaks or anytime they were near the maternity ward.  My mom popped her head in late that afternoon and said that the pediatric center (where she worked) was busy prepping for a c-section later that evening and I replied "yeah, mine."  She was a bit shocked but knew I was in good hands.

 By dinnertime I had dilated enough that my doctor was finally able to break my water and wanted to wait and see if I'd progress on my own.  I remember feeling mostly discouraged because by this point I just wanted to get it over with and eat something!  I did finally begin to progress on my own but very slowly.  It was nearly 11 o'clock at night before I was ready to actually begin pushing.  The doctor had to use forceps, the vacuum, and make a small incision before Ian finally made his way into the world at 12:24 am on Saturday... nearly 42 hours later.

My grandmother (with my sister's baby) and my older sister with Ian when Ian was just a few days old


However, even though Ian was healthy and doing well,  I was having some minor complications. The placenta would not deliver and they had to call the emergency OB to come and perform an emergency D&C to scrape the placenta off the walls of the uterus.  At this point my epidural had been nearly turned off and while they gave me a good dose (or perhaps even 2) of Demerol it was the most painful experience of my life to date (and I've had broken limbs and multiple surgeries).  I didn't even really get to see Ian properly until the next morning.  I remember them handing him to me and me mumbling something to my husband about not letting me drop him but I was just too tired to keep my eyes open after that whole ordeal. 

It's kind of ironic that my first baby was the biggest and definitely the most difficult delivery of the 3.  I'll have to write up a quick post about the other 2 at some point-- it's only fair.  

I hope you'll join us next month when we look at our top 5 family activities. 

 


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Comments

  1. Oh my word Joanne. I'm so glad Ian was healthy, and that you were okay, at the end of it all. That sounds exhausting. And yes, for Sam, my freezing for the stitches never took and it was very, very painful. The post-birth physical recovery is so hard too.

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    1. I was never warned but apparently it's even harder after a DNC; I nearly passed out a week later from loss of blood and trying to do too much. It wasn't until I had Alec and remarked that I recovery was so much easier the second time around to my hospital nurse and after just a 2 minute talk she explained that DNC lead to lots of blood and clots and complications. I'm kind of glad I had no clue!

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  2. I thought my Bub took a long time after going in to be inducted- your Ian takes the cake! It is so cool that you had that many family members connected to healthcare/ the hospital and you were able to see loved ones throughout. Births are amazing!

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    1. I find them absolutely fascinating; none of my 3 were even remotely alike and I was pregnant at a time when nearly all my friends and family members were too so we often shared birth stories.

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  3. Oh my gosh- what an experience. I am so impressed that you had two more kids after this! :)

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    1. Right?! Though I fully admit my first question to my OB after was "so, how likely am I to have a retained placenta with the next baby?" If she hadn't answered "very unlikely we have no idea what causes that"... I might have thought twice!

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  4. Oh my goodness, that post-delivery procedure sounds horrible! What a long labor!

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  5. Ahh! They do say your first always takes the longest and your's was a long labour with Ian. What a trooper you were. I am so glad everything was OK with you both in the end.

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    1. Yep, my doctor warned me that first babies (in particular BIG first babies) are never easy.

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  6. Wow! Ian sure made you wait :) That's such a long labor. My sister-in-law had a really long labor with my nephew. I'm thankful that everything with my kids happened quickly, so I didn't have time to worry. haha

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    1. Yep, he sure did! But as much as I am a worry wart I don't remembering worry much throughout the whole ordeal. I really trusted the hospital staff and my doctor a lot.

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  7. Oh my goodness that was a tough delivery, so good that you and Ian were both well afterwards.
    Ruth@playworkeatrepeat

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  8. OMG, what women go through. I had a long labor with Anna, then eventually a C-section. I do enjoy hearing about labor and birth experiences. Thank you for sharing. 😘❤️

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    1. I nearly cried when they told me they canceled the c-section; I was just ready to be done at that point. Then when the emergency doctor came in he warned me that I might have to have one anyone if the cervix had closed up and I did worry for a few minutes that I'd have to recover from both.

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  9. I can't even imagine! This is why moms are the real superheroes!

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  10. I too had a pretty uncomplicated pregnancy with my first and ended up similar to your delivery. But I did end up having to have a c-section as at some point the baby wasn't getting enough oxygen. Strange to think I had actually planned on trying to deliver with no meds at all but that didn't happend. Having to be induced and then having to have the water broke by the doctor instead of natural really put me past my pain tolerance. For my second child my doctor recommended a c-section from the beginning because of my petite frame which was a good decision since my daughter was even a little bit heavier than my son.

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    1. Oh that is scary! I had planned for zero pain meds too; I had worked with a woman that scared me with a birth story about epidural complications and I was sure I was NOT having one. But my doctor warned me from day 1 to be very, very flexible since you never really know what is going to happen.

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  11. My first was the biggest too. Because she was a C-section the other two ended up being csections too.

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    1. My doctor kept warning me that first babies are usually the smallest but Ian was huge compared to his brothers!

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  12. Oh Joanne, what an experience you went through having Ian. Thank you for sharing how you became a mom.

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    1. You're welcome! It was fun to write up and look back.

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  13. Oh my gosh, I'm sorry you had such a complicated delivery!! It's a wonder you went on to have two more kids!

    Lauren @ Don't Mind Our Mess

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    1. LOL! I hardly even gave it a second thought (and it was nowhere near the worst "delivery" story in my family!).

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  14. Oh, I thought mine was bad! We went in on Tuesday and delivered on Thursday with heavy, awful contractions the entire time. I have always wondered if it was because I was induced just like you! And, you're right...Demerol does very little. I'm glad he was healthy, and everything finally came right.

    https://marshainthemiddle.com/

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    1. I was told that induced labors are usually more intense and much longer lasting than natural.

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  15. Wow, with an experience like that, your other boys are lucky you even thought to go through it again, haha.
    OXOX
    Jodie
    www.jtouchofstyle.com

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  16. Wow, what an ordeal! But what a blessing you both came through healthy and whole. Two of my babies were induced labors and while I'm glad for the medical advances that help us along when needed, induction was not the most fun I'd ever had. LOL So interesting to read all the birth stories!

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    1. Yeah, I do not recommend being induced... but I'm grateful I had that option! I honestly think if that medicine wasn't around they would have scheduled a c-section to take him anyway since he was measuring so large.

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  17. Wow, you did go through a lot! Unfortunately, I know about that all too well as I had a very long birth and major complications after Jacob was born, too. He was also my first and largest baby... hence all of the complications. It was a nightmare as I had terrible hip/back/leg issues and nerve damage for years afterward. BUT, I'd do it all over again to have him and I'm so grateful he's here! I can't wait to see more about your other deliveries!

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  18. Great memories here. Your post made me stop and think. I think I’d struggle to be able to remember that time of my life as well as you do.

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    1. Having a notebook to look back on really helped; though I did remember all the highlights of his birth many of the specifics were fuzzy.

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  19. Oh gosh, I thought "I" was the only one who was in labour for 40+ hours...it was 1971 and nothing like epidurals were around. My symptoms, after a couple of tries at induction, were a pain that came and went...and I was one scared and lonely almost new mum. Away from any kind of support because my husband was teaching at a school 2 hours away/ Fortunately, I eventually had my baby naturally, nearly breaking the nurse's hand and my OBYGN delivered her in his squash clothes as he had been called in from his game. The other part of this story is NO-ONE other than I got to see the baby or hold her...babies were seen in nurseries and her Dad did not hold her until we got in the car to go home after a week. Sigh! So good to see your post this week for Wednesday’s Words and Pics Link Up on Denyse Whelan Blogs. I look forward to you joining us next week too! Denyse.

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    1. I was so thankful that we had so many family and friends popping in; it was a looong boring wait and that helped break up the monotony.

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  20. Bless your heart. Did you have similar placenta issues with your other boys? Did that have anything to do with the hysterectomy you had several years ago? I cannot imagine that pain. My girls were born on military bases where anesthesia was not permitted. With my first daughter, I didn't even get anything for the epidural. Just ripped and then the doctor had to cut me and then out came baby. I had trouble delivering the placenta and was so naive I didn't even know that was a 'thing.' The doctor climbed up on the gurney and began pushing on my stomach because the placenta wouldn't deliver. I thought he was under the (mistaken) impression I had been pregnant with twins and was trying to deliver the other twin. Oh, to be young and innocent.

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    1. I did not have placenta issue with my other two and I never thought to ask if that had anything to do with the fibroid and hysterectomy issues I had. I do remember the doctor pushing down real hard on my stomach trying to get that placenta to deliver and keeping a real close eye on the wall clock before calling in the emergency on call doctor. He briefly explained why it was so important to get the placenta out quickly and then went right to work but I was so tired and so out of it that I hardly remember anything but the pain.

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  21. Oh my. your one strong mama to labor for so long and do it again.

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    1. Luckily the memory fades quite a bit over time. LOL

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